This page will always be as the title suggests. This section will be where I will publish thoughts and testimony, to share from the Bible and encourage.
Moving Testimony
This month is slightly different. I want share a testimony. I want to share about a very difficult time, three years ago when I finally moved home after what seemed an age (10 months), with constant delays and obstacles.
I hope by sharing about this time it will be an encouragement.
It was the 10 August I finally moved into my new home, in which I have lived three years this August.
I owe such heartfelt thanks to many people who helped me through a very difficult time in ways I could hardly take in sometimes.
This actually starts before I had put my flat up for sale. Not for the first time I had a neighbour move into the flat above me who was very disruptive. It was very stressful and there was just no peace, especially in the evenings. I don't need to go into the details of what was going on, but it was intimidating, and I felt very isolated and lonely. Neighbours would often tell me things they had seen and heard and even that they were going to report what they had seen, but I was doubtful that happened. I prayed about it, friends prayed, my lifegroup leaders came round to the flat and prayed. Initially it seemed to improve, but after a couple of weeks, the behaviour and disruption would accelerate again. Even before this neighbour had moved in, I had prayed for a good neighbour, yet here I was in a horrid situation again because previous neighbours had been disruptive, but this was perhaps the worst. I tried Bluetooth headphone so I could at least sit in my living room and listen to music or TV and block out the disruption from upstairs, but they did not work. I moved a desk and TV into my bedroom so when my neighbour was in from work, I could retreat there, so in effect I was living in one room. At least, in there with the inner doors closed it blocked out a good deal of the noise, etc. I found that very hard, there was all this prayer going on about the situation, but even if it did improve, it only got worse. It was hard to understand, all this prayer and yet why?The country was in the grip of the Covid pandemic and with the restrictions, I thought it might put a halt on the behaviour, but my neighbour carried on as normal. At that time, under the restrictions after zoom Church on a Sunday, I would walk down to the beach/park. Sometimes I took books and writing with me, and sometimes I did not. Sitting in the park one day I felt a prompting to look at what Job’s wife said to him. I could not remember the last time, I had particularly read Job, but when I got back to the flat, I looked it up. Job 2 v 9-13. ‘Why don’t you just curse God and die’ That really stayed with me and I hung onto that a lot. Whatever was going on, not to turn against God or blame Him. I believe God could cope with my struggles and meltdowns, but just not to turn against Him. Be honest, meltdown, ask why, but at the end, acknowledge I did not understand, it was hard, but I was going to keep looking to God. Often that just had to be a decision, because the feelings and emotions were not in line!
As the summer went on and nothing improved, I did start to look at properties and consider my options, but it was all a bit half-hearted. Sometimes it is just as daunting thinking about doing something about my situation as it is staying in i and just putting up with it. I was talking to a friend one day over a latest instalment of bad behaviour by the neighbour and the friend said, "you’ve done all you can, now move". A week later I was down the beach again and felt prompted, what did God say to Elijah when he was in the cave. Again, I checked when I got back to the flat, (when was the last time, I particularly read Kings?!), God said to him, ‘what are you doing here Elijah’!! I Kings 19 v 13 When I had made some half-hearted attempts at looking for properties, I did actually enquire about a flat in the Court where I now live. However, because of the Covid restrictions they were not holding viewings unless you had your property on the market, so I left it. I did go and view a flat in Fareham and desperately wanted it to be the right place, but the more I stood there and looked and thought about how little furniture I would be able to get in and lack of windows, I walked away. That was hard, because it could have been a case of just take the first thing to get out of where I was. Just arranging for some valuations was a huge deal. The first one was with some agents recommended by friends. I was so anxious about behaviour of neighbour, really hoped he would be out, as he was. A friend came round for support. I had brought my flat, but had never bought and sold and felt a real lack of knowledge of the process. We both felt the agent valuation and advice was very good and I did not have anymore, which turned out to be a very good decision.
‘The details should be ready by Thursday and it can go on the market’, the agent said. “Uummm, can I see them first, can we wait until Monday next week”, replies a panicking Heather. At the same time, I emailed the agents who I had enquired with earlier in the year. I explained my property was going to be on the market and asking if they had any flats similar to what I had asked about before. The first week my flat went on the market, I had two viewings and two offers. I was not sure which offer to take so my agent suggested asking if either buyer would come up to the asking price. That will make it easy I thought, but No, because they both came up to the asking price. I was so conflicted, because although people said my neighbour’s behaviour was not my responsibility, that was not how I felt, and I did not want anyone else to go through what I had been going through. My agent had rung me last thing Friday so we agreed I would decide over the weekend and ring him back Monday. I did so, still not really knowing which offer to take. Then the agent said the person buying to live seemed nervous about the street and was asking about neighbours and said she knocked every door in a street on a previous move. That settled it with me and I said if the buyer was that nervous, I would go with investor, which proved best decision I feel, especially because of how long it took and the complications that arose. I finished the call to my agent and the other agents who I had emailed phoned me. She told me she had emailed me to say they had no flats at present but was ringing me because, quote...” as if by magic, by manager is expecting an instruction on another flat at Linden Court”! It was about a week and a half later I went and viewed where I now live. I walked in and just exhaled and thought, oh yes. We discussed the price and when the agent said I was first to see the flat because they knew I was looking and advised sellers to hold out for asking price, I just thought, I’m not mucking about and offered and it was accepted. “In by Christmas then, the agent said to me”. I was quite blown away, within a couple of weeks, I had sold my current flat and found a new place – little knowing how long the process would then take!!
Approaching Christmas, I was already feeling overwhelmed by the process, not really understanding what happened when and how long things took and also by my own solicitor and a lack of communication. At the same time, the behaviour and disruption from the neighbour had not improved. I was so exhausted both physically and emotionally, my older brother offered that I could stay at his house, (the former family home), as there was a spare room. I said I would just be there evenings and weekends. I was sat in the room I used one night, asking God if there was someone who could step in and help, but it was such a huge thing to ask of anyone, I felt so swamped by the whole situation. I had a call from a friend asking how the process was going and giving some very vague answers.
Friend: "Has this been done"? Me: " Has what been done"?
Friend: "What about this"? Me: "What is that"?
Friend: "Have you asked about this"? Me: "Have I asked about what"?
It was that kind of conversation.
Could you do with someone coming alongside to help, the friend asked, well yes, replies myself, “can I do that for you!” I was absolutely amazed, but so relieved and what an answer to prayer! Neither of us knew how long it would take, how complicated it would get and the demands that would be made, so I was more than grateful for the help, otherwise I would have given up.
At Christmas also, I made a list of all the people who had an input into the process, from solicitors on both sides, to lenders, buyer’s, sellers,
co-freeholder! I prayed blessing over all of them. I meant my prayer but it was definitely a case of making the decision to pray this way and let feelings and emotions catch up! We continued on and each time, my solicitor advised something had been done, there always seemed to be a ‘but’…! Many times, I heard, ‘almost there’, however it was always feeling like, one step forward and about five back. Grateful as I was to my brother, the situation was not easy for either of us really. I was always out of the house by 9am and often went down to the beach first for a coffee or a walk or both. After that, I would go to the flat for the day to finish packing, sorting etc and stay there as long as I could bear. It was the way that anytime after 3pm, my neighbour would get in from work, so at 3pm, I could feel myself getting anxious as it got nearer to 3pm.. I would often go back to beach for another walk as it was a bit early to go back to my brother’s. Some days I just could not bear to go to the flat, so I ended up just driving around parked up in car at various places. I had plenty of really low moments and it can be extremely overwhelming. All I can say is, all the faithful prayers and particular friends who I could just blurt things out to, kept me going. In the midst of all the fog you can lost sight of God or should I say clear sight! Driving around parked up in car was best way I could manage some days. Sometimes all you can do is just hang on in there. I journal, and so glad I do, because I would write down things people said, scriptures friends posted on facebook, things I read and even now as I type this, and look back it is amazing how much God was speaking even when you don’t feel like He is. So many times, I was feeling at such a low ebb and 'it never going to happen', sense, but a friend would ring up to just chat and asked how I was.
Time continued and the process seemed to clear one hurdle and then another was put up. At this point, it transpired my buyer’s mortgage offer was due to expire at the end of March. Efforts were made to try and push the process forward, but at this point it all seemed a bit hopeless to me. I was taken to the account of Lazarus in John 11 v 1-7. A familiar story to us, when Jesus turned up, Lazarus had been in the grave four days, but He called him out. I looked at a study of this and found out that apparently there was a superstition/tradition at that time, that a soul hung around a body for three days in case there was a chance of it returning to the body, so to be the fourth day, it was accepted there was no hope. It encouraged me, because at this time, the process felt pretty dead to me. We went past the end of March and my buyer’s mortgage offer expired; this was like the fourth day to me, well totally no hope now! I think this was when I knew I had made right decision in regard to my buyer. They had never put any pressure as regards completing the sale and now just said they would be organising a new mortgage offer. One stand-out scripture throughout the whole process was Job 42 v 2, ‘I know that you can do anything and no plans of yours can be thwarted’.
Time continued!!! My Buyer had new mortgage, but now another hurdle was presented. I was thinking back to the list I had written down at Christmas at all the people, ‘who had a finger in the pie’, as it were and not for the first time, feeling deeply frustrated. I just felt there was all the people who seemed to be having a say in this and the one person who appeared silent was God! It was very hard going back to my brothers house, expressing it should not be long now, only to go back a day to two later and say we now had another issue. Then I read the account of when the disciples were in the boat, Jesus was asleep and a great storm arose, in Matt 8 v 23-26. As we read, Jesus arose and spoke to the waves and wind and they ceased. I had a sense of, there would come that time, when God would speak and all the other voices would stop and the process would finish.
When the week finally arrived where monies were being exchanged and dates given it was all a bit surreal really and I was still waiting for something else to happen. The day before completion I walked around my old flat and I prayed, for the new people who would be coming in, and the neighbour in flat above.
When I moved, certainly for the first few weeks I felt like I had gone on holiday to a hotel somewhere! I kept walking around thinking ‘is this really mine’. I still do go into Gosport, apart from anything else, my family still all live in Bridgemary and I found myself on a couple of occasions going past end of my old road, parking and just looking at old flat. I looked on Rightmove website and saw when it was put up for rent and then when it was let. I think I just needed to know it was gone and I had an analogy of standing down at the beach at Stokes Bay and looking out to sea with ships on the horizon. I could see them, they were there, but quite a way off. Then as they continued sailing, they would eventually be out of sight. Something else God said about the old flat was from Mark 6 v 11. I really needed to leave it behind in all ways. Back in the summer a few of us in the street would sit out the front of the flats and it was really good. When I told them I was moving, they said, come back and see us, but for me it is not good to go back. Good to meet up for a coffee with people, but not to go back to that street.
A few months after my move one of my previous neighbours messaged and asked how I am and how everything is going. They have also told me the behaviour in flat above my old place has improved. That happened when I was there, but then it would just escalate again, but I prayed it would continue. One thing I thought was that sometimes God needs to give us an extra nudge and maybe there was a bit of that with this. In reality I should have probably have moved years ago. When I was working full time at a previous company for many reasons, I had a sense it was time to move on, but I had been there a long time, familiar, etc, so despite have having what I believed was a word from God I was dragging my heals, then my role was made redundant!!
My abiding thoughts from this time, is to never turn against God. It was very hard not to give up, but at my real low points, a walk with a friend, a phone call, going for a walk down the beach, prayers, practical help from friends, kept me going and believing, God would sort this whole things out.
Where I lived before I called it 'the flat', now I say 'home'.
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